Grandma's Little Girl

Grandma and I are very different, she is elegant, classy, and sophisticated while I’m a bit tomboyish, "malikot", and waaaay impatient, but I never felt that she loved me less. 

She is also old-fashioned, because duh, she’s my grandmother. I remember her buying me sunday dresses when I was young, and telling me that my skirt is too short when I was already in my early twenties (I just LOL'd). 

I spent my grade school days living with my grand parents. I believed that she was a hundred years old, until I realized that she never grows old for years (hey I was young and gullible and love boasting to my classmates that my grandmother is better than theirs, "wala kayo sa lola ko!"). I would sleep beside her when papa won't stop snoring and she wouldn't mind even if I ended up hoarding the blanket.

If Grandpa and I have M*A*S*H and Bewitched, we have Murder She Wrote and card games (also those children books where where every kid tells the dog to bark). She thought me how to play solitaire and memory card game. I guess I got from her my love for mystery T.V. series and my bad-ass card games skills. 

She is a very patient and nurturing grandmother and a strict and detailed-oriented mentor. She would spend her time convincing me to read and to write, and being the active kid that I am, I would rather play outside. Side note: I remember her getting frustrated at me for not knowing how to spell "John",  I wrote it one time as "Jhon" (HOMAYGEDS I'm already jeje at an early age *cringe*). How I wish I had listened to her before and probably I’d be published just like her instead of rambling at blogs and Facebook and twitter.

There would be times where I would watch her write and edit papers in freehand (she used to use a typewriter but when her eye sight got worst, she would write her papers and I would be the one to encode it in MS Word for printing) and would be amazed at her wonderful handwriting. Looking back, I realized I am the granddaughter of a grammar nazi. LOL. But like I said, she never loved me less.

She was also the reason why I have renewed my faith. It might not be as similar and strong as hers, but it's faith nonetheless. 

I always tell her I love her, and tell her she’s beautiful because she is and a lot of people can attest to that. 

Last night, I dreamt of grandpa, then I went to our dining room where I saw a lot of balloons. I asked our angels what the balloons are for and they said to welcome grandma home. When I woke up I received a text from my uncle saying they were in the hospital with grandma. An hour later, papa called to say grandma passed away. I won’t get into details of how she was when I last saw her, but I could say, though I’m not surprised, I am shocked and still not ready to accept reality. It took me more than an hour to realize what my dream meant. I'm never underestimating dreams again. 

To say that "grandma was” is something I’m not ready to accept yet. But I need to. I have to. One thing that won’t change though is my love and admiration for her. She is my grandma. She will forever be an inspiration.

To grandma and grandpa, I love you both and miss you a lot. I feel so lucky that I was able to get to grow up with the both of you and I'm glad I always get to tell you that I love you. I know you guys are in a better place and watching over us. I hope I continue make you proud.

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I always remind myself to blog more, to express myself in more than 160 characters. It's sad that an event like this has to happen for me to be able to visit this page again. </3